


5 times Gina stole Rosa's food/drink and 1 time she got called out for it

by peraltiagoisland



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: 5+1, F/F, PLS LIKE THIS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-09
Updated: 2017-02-09
Packaged: 2018-09-23 02:59:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9637967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peraltiagoisland/pseuds/peraltiagoisland
Summary: Gina scoffs. "Name one time I stole something you were going to eat or drink."Rosa smirks. "I can name five.""Really? A list? You've been hanging out with Amy too much."





	

"Wait, they did what?"

Gina finds out about the whole Hitchcock-And-Scully-Stealing-Rosa's-Moose-Tracks-Ice-Cream-Causing-Her-To-Almost-Murder-Them-In-Cold-Blood-Effectively-Retiring-Them-From-The-Force debacle about a few hours too late, but she still relishes the chance to chide them for this horrid crime. After all, putting Hitchcock and Scully in their places so they remain tame and docile is one of the top contenders for Gina's favorite work activities.

So it's not long before Gina's got Hitchcock and Scully obediently sat at the table next to the fridge (she had wanted them to stand, really, out of respect for her beautiful presence, but her fear-inducing nature was sadly not as powerful as Hitchcock and Scully's combined laziness) as she chews them out for their wrongdoings.

"You will tell me, what you did, and you will tell me _now_." She says, in her voice specially reserved for high stakes interrogations. Which she's completely trained for, because she's (secretly) watched Rosa interrogate a few people.

Okay, a lot of people. Watching Rosa get all feisty and threatening on all those criminals gives Gina a rush, and is her number one favorite activity to do in the precinct. Which is not part of her job description, but she heavily despises most of her responsibilities here, so who cares?

Also, when Rosa does something to scare her ~~victims~~ _suspects_ , through slamming a palm or a fist against the table, or kicking the side of the table, or even just by glaring at them harshly, the look of pure terror on all of their faces always puts this slight smile on Rosa's face. And it... does things to Gina. It's something she wouldn't miss for the world. Because it's ridiculously hot to watch.

Anyway, her eating popcorn (yes, watching Rosa slam tables and yell is popcorn-worthy entertainment and then some) while secretly watching Rosa interrogate criminals might come in handy some day, when the criminals decide they want to talk to a decent, amazing, one-of-a-kind, gorgeous-

What was she talking about again? Oh right, Gina might have to interrogate someone someday, so watching Rosa interrogate people was a true learning process for her because she took her job very seriously.

"You already know what we did," Hitchcock says, trying to sound tough. It's admirable, but Gina knows she can crack him soon.

Scully, on the other hand, is already sweating nervously (which is double his usual sweat, so Gina makes a mental note to get someone to burn the chair he's sitting on right now) and can't even look her in the eye.

"I'm perfectly aware of what you gremlins did." She says, folding her arms. "But I want to hear it from the both of you. Confess your sins."

Hitchcock's still standing (or to be more accurate, sitting) his ground, and Gina wonders where he got all this confidence from because she needs to crush it fast. A Hitchcock that's too confident could be a real danger to the Nine-Nine, not to mention the city itself.

"If you don't tell me, you can forget about all your Game Of Thrones theories, because I'll delete that text message chain."

Hitchcock looks genuinely scared now, and she almost smiles because she's done it again.

"You wouldn't." He says.

"I have four other text message chains for Game Of Thrones theories with a ton of other people who aren't losers. One of which is dedicated _specifically_ to Jon Snow and the fate of his tight, lily-white ass. I'm keeping the two of you in the loop out of _pity_."

"We ate Rosa's Moose Tracks ice cream!" Hitchcock quickly and desperately admits.

"We're sorry." Scully says. "Please still love us."

Gina groans, nearly gagging.

"I'm not even gonna respond to that."

She clears her throat, and then begins.

"So- first of all, how _dare_ the two of you?" Hitchcock and Scully stare at their shoes, looking guilty, which they should be. "I looked the other way when you stole Amy's lunch two weeks ago, I laughed and nearly high-fived the two of you when you stole Charles's stew the other day- but Rosa? Really? Now _that's_ crossing the line."

"We'll never do it again," Scully whimpers. "Never."

Gina sighs. "And I heard not only did neither of you apologize to Rosa, you also tricked her into getting you a pizza?"

"In our defense," Hitchcock interjects. "That pizza gave us a tummy ache."

"Everything gives you two a tummy ache! You guzzle everything in sight that's half-an-arm's reach."

Suddenly, Gina's greeted by the familiar footsteps of Rosa.

"What's going on?" She asks.

Gina smiles. "Oh, I'm just about to dish these two a punishment."

Rosa smirks. "Nice. For what?"

"For eating your ice cream, duh. You're welcome by the way."

Rosa snorts. "Wait- let me get this straight. You're lecturing Hitchcock and Scully for eating my ice cream?"

Gina raises an eyebrow. "Yes. Why aren't you more happy about this?"

"Because it's ironic as hell."

"What?" Gina feels betrayed. "How dare you?"

"You steal my food and drinks all the time. As glad as I am to get to punish them on top of the laxatives I put in their meatball subs just now-"

"You what?" Hitchcock exclaims.

"No wonder I feel funny." Scully groans. "Although, that's probably just Gina being mad at me."

Rosa ignores them. "-you kind of have no right to be lecturing them." She shrugs. "Sorry, but it's the truth."

Gina scoffs. "Name _one_ time I stole something you were going to eat or drink."

Rosa smirks. "I can name five."

"Really? A _list_? You've been hanging out with Amy too much."

**1\. Fries**

"You're really doing this?"

"Yes. You stole my fries, Gina. I'm calling you out."

"When did Gina steal your fries?" Hitchcock asks.

"We were out at a fast food place. I hadn't eaten all day and I asked if you wanted to come grab dinner with me. And then when I went to the bathroom I came back to see that you were eating my fries." Rosa summarizes.

Gina groans. "Seriously- who are you, Joey Tribbiani? It's fries. Those are things people share." And in Gina's defense, she had thought they were on a date. Except the next day Rosa's boyfriend came into the precinct for a surprise visit and to pick her up. They then kissed, kind of vulgarly, and Gina had to look away.

It wasn't a great memory. The day after, that was, not the dinner itself. The dinner had been great, and resulted in many more meals shared between the two of them.

Rosa shrugs. "Whatever. It was still my fries. Which you took without permission. Which you continue to steal to this day. That time was just the first that I knew of."

"So what's next?" Asks Scully.

"Come on, Scully! Don't encourage her!"

**2\. Beer (And Other Alcoholic Drinks)**

"I really hate this list." Gina complains.

"Too bad." Rosa says. "Because I love this list. I finally understand what Santiago's getting at."

"But it's just beer- I drink whatever when I'm drunk."

Rosa snorts. "It's not just my beer- anything I order at Shaw's gets sipped or gulped down by you half the time."

"How am I supposed to know whose drink belongs to who? You didn't write your name on the bottle, Rosa. This is on you."

Rosa's still smiling. Which means she has a good counter. "Remember that time Charles almost drank my beer?"

_Charles had just closed a big case that had him slogging away for weeks that night. He waltzed into Shaw's, disoriented and majorly sleep-deprived. All he wanted was to nurse down a nice, cold beer._

_"Anyone drinking this?" He asked almost desperately, pointing at Rosa's beer. "I'll pay them back."_

_Rosa was about to just let Charles go ahead and finish her beer. She had already drained about half of it anyway, and she knew how hard work had been on the guy those past few weeks. But then Gina spoke up._

_"That's Rosa's." Gina said, implying that Charles should keep his hand at least five feet away from the bottle. "Get your own drink."_

_Of course, Charles responded automatically and went up to the bar, afraid of what Rosa might do to him. Which Rosa wasn't sure whether to be flattered or offended by._

"You clearly knew it was my drink, yet about two minutes later you almost finished the entire bottle."

Gina shrugs. "Sorry for being broke, Rosie. Didn't know your drinks were off-limits."

Rosa rolls her eyes. "Don't play that card on me. You know you have more money than me. Or just as much. And you always buy your own drinks. You just keep drinking mine too."

"Yeah, Gina! What's up with that?"

"Hitchcock, I swear I'll smack you across the face if you keeping talking."

**3\. Mints**

"What?"

"You heard me. You stole my mints. I saw you open my secret mint drawer and take them Gina, you're not getting away with this." Rosa says, her arms folded confidently.

"You have a secret mint drawer?" Scully asks, his mouth agape just like Hitchcock's. They're both obviously interested in that mint drawer, which is crazy. Rosa rolls her eyes.

"Ugh," Gina groans. "It's just mints. You two eat skittles by the gallon."

"We like mints." Hitchcock says. "It's a candy too."

"A spicy candy," Scully interjects. "But it makes me feel alive. Like cocaine used to do."

Rosa and Gina narrow their eyes at Scully.

"Are you seriously comparing mints to cocaine?" Rosa says incredulously.

"Ignore them. They're still high from whatever they snorted twenty years ago. And I didn't take your mints. Why would you even have mints?"

"Bribery purposes. Also filing police reports get tiring. Why can't I eat mints?"

Gina knows Rosa eats mints. She can smell it on her breath when Rosa's standing close enough, which is incredibly distracting. There's something about Rosa that- when combined with a minty scent really messes with Gina's mind. It makes her brain go fuzzy and she can barely process anything Rosa says, let alone come up with a witty retort. It's a miracle that Gina has an upper tier body which churns out the most amazing of quips and responses on default.

"You're allowed to eat mints, sweetie." Gina says, and she doesn't know if she's imagining all this, but Rosa's cheeks gain the slightest bit of a blush when Gina calls her that. "I'm just saying I didn't steal them."

"I can show you the surveillance tapes."

Gina groans. "Fine, I stole your mints. Happy now?"

"Very."

**4\. Coffee**

"There's more? This list isn't over?"

"She said she was going to list five things, Gina. She's only listed three so far." Scully explains, albeit met with no appreciation whatsoever on Gina's part.

"I didn't ask, Scully."

"But he's right." Rosa smirks, to Gina's frustration. "And I can't not mention how often you drink my coffee without asking."

"When did I ever-"

"May 30th, 2015." Rosa crosses her arms. "Which was yesterday."

Gina sighs. "Again, how was I supposed to know it was your coffee?"

"It was half empty and on my desk. It also had my name on the side. Written in _caps_."

It's then that Gina realizes she probably has a bit of an issue. Sure, she steals food and drinks from other people every now and then, but never half-eaten or half-drunk stuff. But off the top of her head she recalls multiple occasions of which she's just casually taken a bite from Rosa's lunch when it's left unattended, grabbed a piece of lettuce or a cherry tomato from Rosa's plate. And yes, she's stolen sips of Rosa's coffee. She doesn't dwell on how she often gets the faintest taste of mint on Rosa's coffee cups, and how it probably indicates a serious secret addiction to mints on Rosa's part, because how she manages to leave the taste of mint almost everywhere she places her lips is frankly rather frightening.

"Then just drink my coffee, Rosa. I steal from you, you steal from me- we'll call it even."

Rosa exhales, nearly laughing. "I think I'd have to steal thousands of cups of coffee from you for us to call it even."

**5\. Sandwich**

"Okay, this isn't unique to just you. I steal Hitchcock's sandwiches all the time." Gina says almost proudly.

"It's why I buy two sandwiches for work everyday." Hitchcock responds defeatedly.

"You've always been bringing two sandwiches to work every day." Gina retorts. "It's why I started stealing your food."

Hitchcock relents. "Fine. That's why I bring three sandwiches to work everyday."

"You bring four, Hitchcock. We can all see your sandwiches in the fridge because you label them with your name." Rosa points out.

"His _picture_." Gina corrects, making a face at the memory. "It makes me not want to open the fridge sometimes."

Hitchcock smiles. "Good. I'd like to get my fourth sandwich back."

"You should do what I do, Hitchcock." Scully suggests. "I take a bite out of each of my five sandwiches so no one touches them."

"Good advice." Rosa says to Gina's chagrin. "Maybe I should do that- except it probably won't stop Gina."

Gina huffs. "Okay, I'll play along. When did I steal your sandwich? I'll admit to the fries, beer-"

"Try _all_ alcoholic beverages."

Gina rolls her eyes. "Fine, all alcoholic beverages. The mints, and the coffee. Which are all really small things so you should chill- but I didn't steal your sandwich."

"September 6th, 2012." Rosa says. "Jimmy Jab games."

Gina groans. "What is it with you and suddenly being so good at dates?"

Hitchcock and Scully groan too. "Don't remind us of that horrible day."

"Yeah, Rosa. That was one of the worst days of our lives."

_That year for the Jimmy Jab games, the prize up for grabs had been this sandwich. It was this huge, six foot long sandwich donated by this upper class sandwich deli to the Nine-Nine to thank them for quickly solving a B &E and protecting their sales. Of course, because they were all on call and Terry was gone for a three hour meeting at One Police Plaza, they decided to use the sandwich as the grand prize for winning the Jimmy Jab games that year._

_This served to really pump everyone up. Jake wanted to win because of the awesomeness of getting to own (and eat) a six foot long sandwich. Charles wanted to win because he needed to taste the sandwich for his food blog. Hitchcock and Scully desperately desperately wanted to win for obvious gluttony-related reasons, and Amy wanted to win because she just wanted to win. Amy was competitive, and that competitiveness rarely wavered._

_But of course, everyone's greed made them stupid, and in the end Rosa emerged victorious. The award ceremony that year was incredibly somber, almost like they were at a funeral. Which was Rosa's ideal award ceremony, so it just made winning feel even better for her._

_"Are you going to share?" Hitchcock asked._

_"Yeah, please! I just want one bite. One teeny bite. Of every part of this sandwich." Jake begged. The sandwich was basically six footlongs each containing premium orders at the sandwich deli. It looked glorious, and because of how well they stored the sandwich during the games, it was incredibly warm too. Rosa herself could feel the heat radiating off the bread. She couldn't wait to dig in._

_"I just need three bites from every different sandwich. I won't even swallow! You can have the sandwich back all chewed up for free!" Charles offered, not realizing how unappealing his offer was and making Rosa and everyone else in the room gag._

_"Okay, so Charles is not allowed within at least fifty feet of this sandwich anymore." Gina declared, disgusted beyond belief._

_"Agreed." Rosa said simply._

_In the end, in order to keep the sandwich safe, Rosa told Gina to keep the sandwich in insulated containers which were to be placed in Babylon until Rosa could bring it home._

"But when I walked in a few hours later, there you were eating my sandwich."

Gina shrugs. "How was I supposed to know you didn't want me to have any? I mean- I host the games every year, I'm entitled to at least _half_ of the prize since I never get the chance to fight for it myself."

"You didn't ask, Gina."

"Also- you asked me to put the sandwich in _Babylon_. That practically gave me partial ownership." Gina continues, arguing the logic of her theft.

"You still stole my sandwich." Rosa reminds.

**6\. Ice Cream**

"Okay, fine. Blah blah _bleh_ \- technically I stole food from you sometimes and the occasional drink. What do you want? An apology? A promise that I'll never touch something that belongs to you for as long as I live and breathe?"

Rosa shrugs. "No."

"And if you knew all this time about me stealing your food or swiping your drinks- then why didn't you mention it before?"

"Because I didn't have a reason to before. But just now you were lecturing Hitchcock and Scully for stealing my Moose Tracks ice cream. Yet half an hour ago I saw you take one from the new box of Moose Tracks ice cream I bought."

Gina sighs. "What can I say? Moose Tracks ice cream is heavenly. You know what? I'm not even going to punish Hitchcock and Scully for stealing your ice cream anymore."

"Yes!" They cheer, giving each other a hug. By the looks of it, it's as if Gina just decided to release them from a death sentence.

Rosa shrugs. "Whatever. I don't care. But, I guess I do wanna ask- why do you keep stealing from me? You don't take anyone else's food or drinks, at least not as much as you do to me."

Gina gives a half-hearted laugh. "If you're asking whether I think you're a pushover, the answer is no."

"I wasn't. But I still wanna know why."

Gina's eyes trail down slightly and she gulps. "Maybe I'll tell you one day- when you aren't so saddled down with a boyfriend."

Rosa's confused, and before she can even ask Gina what the hell she means by that, she's already walking away, and Rosa's left to wonder about what just happened.

**Author's Note:**

> pining!gina amirite or am i wrong and a demon for this
> 
> also WOW congrats to me for not shamelessly inserting jake x amy into a dianetti fic for once!!


End file.
